I believe there are no random connections, especially when it comes to people with whom you have long-term relationships - lasting more than a year.
This all definitely comes from past lives because people reincarnate in groups to learn and work through specific things.
We attract people with our traumas. This is to create balance in a couple.
For example, if a woman has very strong masculine characteristics, she will attract a man with strong feminine characteristics - for balance.
If a woman dates immature men who lie on the sofa and don’t want to take responsibility, it means this woman has a strong need to take care of someone. This woman is a “mommy” type - subconsciously, she finds herself a “child.”
Essentially, in a couple, we are developing the same qualities, just in opposite ways. And what annoys us in our partner is our own shadow sides - the parts of ourselves we reject or don’t acknowledge.
But as soon as we start working on ourselves, we see how our feelings toward the person change. For example, after working through your traumas and issues, you might start feeling uncomfortable with that person - especially if they are not working on their own issues. Then what they give you will stop affecting you. For instance, if you lacked love in childhood and, feeling unloved, you found a partner who gives you only love and smothering care, then after healing this within yourself, you will no longer need such a partner. Therefore, in the vast majority of cases, either both people grow together (more or less), or if one person grows more seriously than the other, they break up because it becomes uncomfortable to be together. What attracted you to the person before will stop attracting you.
The foundation for relationships is our relationship with our parents.
A woman will subconsciously treat her partner the way her mother treated her father.
And everything the mother thought about the father, the woman will transfer onto her husband. It’s the same for a man. Everything a man thinks about his partner is what he thought about his mother. And everything a man thinks about himself is what his mother thought about his father. And since a man is a continuation of his father, he starts thinking about himself in the same way.
And this is also not random. We end up in a family, in relationships, not by accident, because we have certain triggers, certain problems, certain traumas. We sort of end up in an environment where we can work through them as quickly as possible.
It’s not childhood that makes us traumatized; rather, we end up in such a childhood because we were already traumatized before.
By understanding the foundation, understanding how it all works, healing the relationship with your mother, improving the relationship with your father, forgiving your mom, dad, and previous partners, you can very quickly improve any relationship.
I’m writing this from personal experience. I had a controlling mother, a father I was not happy with (I wished for a different father), and difficult family-like relationships with a partner for 10 years.
And I have healed all of this.
That’s why I’m sharing this basic information.
There are also many family histories, patterns, and entanglements. And it’s all connected.
So we can amplify each other’s family patterns.
This is very easy to see in the area of money. Very often, a husband and wife have no money problems before marriage. But as soon as they get married, their family patterns start to mix and intensify, and their financial situation gets worse and worse.
Of course, there can be positive dynamics too, but it’s less common.
I know a girl (a Capricorn). She had four serious relationships. Each time, she worked hard, earned money, build a house or bought an apartment, and then suddenly left, leaving everything to her partner.
And as soon as she left, the partner’s situation wouldn’t just improve - it would skyrocket 20 times over, both in money and everything else.
So they are simply acting out some of their own family patterns.
And it’s important to find and heal these patterns.