The Lover in his fullness, the mature Lover, allows you to connect in a healthy way with other people, the planet, and yourself.
Some qualities of the Lover archetype in men:
He lets us enter in to the flow of life, feel our connection with our vitality, and holds an awareness of life and death.
He acknowledges and celebrates connection with others and allows us to feel grief when we lose something we valued, or when we become aware of something we should have had, but which we never felt (e.g. unconditional love from mother or father).
He feels compassion, love and empathy. He softens the energy of the King archetype
The Lover is our primal archetype, the first one to grow after birth, when we seek connection with mother. That connection is about acceptance and love, and represents the natural way for each one of us to be met in the world as a baby: feeling that we are the centre of the world, and mother revolves around us, meeting our every need, and accepting our needs as they are presented.
This is the area of sensual pleasure: of bodily feeling, of the pleasure of food, touch, holding, love.
The primal satisfaction of the mother-baby connection is mirrored in the later pleasure we feel in such sensual pleasures as massage, holding and being held by a lover, sensual pleasures of food and drink, and so on.
This is the archetype that drives our search for love and relationship, i.e. connection, throughout our lives.
If we do not have good connections, or we have experienced major loss, we can carry immense grief.
This archetype seeks pleasure, satisfaction and self-indulgence. At his core, the energy of the Lover is not interested in boundaries. One of the Lover’s drives is to merge with others, to feel at one with them, as for example in the loss of self some people feel at the moment of orgasm.
I am integrating “masculine” archetypes in me also, because we have feminine and masculine energies… and when both are balanced you are whole and you can use your whole powers. This includes shadows also.
@Zylof In general, it’s not strictly necessary, but if one is on a long-term journey of self-discovery and aims to foster a stable character, at some point they might need to acknowledge and integrate their opposing energies.
Masculine energy embodies strength, action, momentum, assertiveness, and firmness. Feminine energy, on the other hand, represents softness, emotions, vulnerability, abundance, and receptiveness, among other things.
I believe that for an individual to feel truly whole and internally stable, there should be a balance, whether subtle or pronounced, between these two energies. Reflect on whether you might need to adjust a particular aspect to find your inner balance, and trust your intuition.
It’s entirely possible that you already embody a harmonious blend of both masculine and feminine qualities, and there might be no need for further adjustments.
Would this help correct abuse or to much masculinity in a women? Either way I am using this on everyone in my family to help heal love and help us all connect at a deeper level.
They can be used in this way. The archetypes are quite extreme until their opposites are added, and everyone needs love and the archetype of the lover.
